The Little Prince by Antoine De Saint-Exupery


"If someone loves a flower of which just one example exists among all the millions and millions of stars, that's enough to make him happy when he looks at the stars. He tells himself, 'My flower's up there somewhere...' But if the sheep eats the flower, then for him it's as if, suddenly, all the stars went out. And that isn't important?'"

"It is much harder to judge yourself than to judge others. If you succeed in judging yourself, it's because you're truly a wise man."

"Where are the people?" the little prince inquired politely.
The flower had one day seen a caravan passing.
"People? there are six or seven of them, I believe, in existence. I caught sight of them years ago. But you never know where to find them. The wind blows them away. They have no roots, which hampers them a good deal."

"One sees clearly only with the heart. Anything essential is invisible to the eyes."

"And when you're consoled (everyone is eventually consoled), you'll be glad you've known me. You'll always be my friend. You'll feel like laughing with me. And you'll open your windows sometimes just for the fun of it... And your friends will be amazed to see you laughing while you're looking up at the sky. Then you'll tell them, 'Yes, it's the stars. They always make me laugh!"

"You risk tears if you let yourself be tamed."

"This is the saddest landscape in the world."

~

"How are you today, my dear?"

"It doesn't matter," I wanted to say. "My heart doesn't matter." Instead I just shrugged off her question, much like I usually do.

I purchased The Little Prince today at the bookstore and read it this evening. I am not yet consoled, but I think I was tamed and that is why I've cried. I can't decided if I am the fox, the flower, or the prince. I think that maybe I am pieces of all of them sewn together like a patchwork quilt. I think, also, that I am a grown-up in ways I don't want to be. I am a serious person.

I also bought The Great Divorce by C.S. Lewis, but I haven't had the chance to read any more than the introduction or preface or author's note or whatever it is. I've got three books going right now: The Great Divorce, The Once and Future King, and Ptolemy's Gate.

I finally got Route Y to work long enough to look at off-campus housing stuffs. Collected a few numbers and so forth and will be needing to call them tomorrow if at all possible. I daren't wait too long because my landlord wants to know REALLY SOON if I am going to re-sign. A year is a long commitment for housing, though, because a great deal can happen in a year. Not that I show any signs of progressing towards marriage or anything of the sort now, but come next spring I may.

Going to lunch with a friend from high school tomorrow. She and her family are up visiting her brother and his new girlfriend so she called me tonight to see if I'd be free for a bit tomorrow afternoon. Obviously I am since I don't have any class.

My heart hurts. I should make brownies. Except I won't be able to share them because we're not speaking. I wish chocolate still made everything better. Nothing heals me anymore. Not even tears.