Friday, March 01, 2013
Recently I was reading all the amazing quotes that I wrote down from when I was in Taiwan. Here are some of my favorites (to Protect the Identities of the Innocent, I have changed all of my roommates' names to numbers):
- Lauren: “If you want to take a picture, put my poo on your food.”
- Mom: “I admit that the Modern Toilet would be a place I do not think I would go to. My body knows what it's supposed to be doing when I sit there - and it wouldn't be very pretty!”
- Ten: “I see a trash can!” One: “I brought my camera, don’t even worry.”
- Two: “I think I’m going to do that, just for funny.”
- Seven: “Was that Irish?” Two: “I don’t know what that was. Let’s not talk about it.”
- Two: “Yes, I hum in Chinese.”
- Lauren: “Our service turned into gluttony, but it’s OK!”
- Sister B: “You know in our body we have a lot of cells, and they die. Mine are already dying.”
- Ten: “[Two] just gave me a flat tire!” Two: “Because I love you!”
- Dad: in regards to finding a hotel in Taiwan “Make sure it’s clean and nice, not a brothel.”
- One: “And then these thoughts come into your head and you say, ‘yep!’ and then they go away.”
- Ten: “It’s like a Mormon rave! … with only four girls.” Two: “That’s pretty much what a Mormon rave is.”
- One: “Guys! I’m not wearing a bra!” Three: “I’m glad you brought that up.” Ten: “And that’s why the lights are off.”
- One: “That was so ninja!”
- One: “Have you seen [Seven]? I have bad news for her: I don’t have her underwear!”
- Two: “Where do you get your underwear? I buy mine in Taiwan. At the Easy Shop!”
- Dad: “Maybe we’ll get you some compression pantyhose so you don’t come home with bungles. And it’s plural because you have two buns.”
- Johnny: “Who is Cinderella?” Me: “She loses her glass slipper.” Johnny: “Her shoe? She can go buy another one, it’s OK! Throw this one out and buy two more!”
- Seven: “Oh! I wanted to get into your closet!”
- One: “I wish I could take my lips off and just leave them up here.”
- One: “I feel more and more like a mix between a cockerspaniel and a bag lady.”
- One: “Where’s my night bottle?”
- Three: “One time at church, [Ten] gave me a tissue and it smelled like boy. Do you want to smell it?” One: “You still have it?” Three: “Yeah, it’s right here!”
- One: “[Ten]? I’m going to sleep now, but I forgot to tell you to watch out for the zombie dolphins.”
- William (5G): “How do you 'go around the bed?'”
- Three: “The real question is, were you wearing a bra?”
- Eight: “ We’re all friends here. I’ll hit you with this frying pan!”
- Four: “I’ll destroy his face! Hand me the bowl.”
- One: “There was still underwear in these sweats! It was the weirdest feeling!”
